I use a Bible app on my phone where i have a Bible reading plan called Life application study Bible devotion. It’s a year long plan with a small devotion and a verse or two after that. App is found here with their online version too if you wish to see: BIBLE

Anyway, through the years that I’ve been a christian, 5 or so years, I’ve more or less always struggled with reading God’s word. I have tried different reading plans, translations, languages (Estonian and English), different locations, times etc. Nothing has got me hooked on it just yet. But i am working on it still. So Since i know my struggles to read i thought to at least get a LITTLE Scripture in my life daily. Which started me on this devotional. Today as i read this it made me think. Often i just go through the motions of reading it and getting my “box ticked” that i read it. Today, well today was different.
Here it is.
Day 165:
Jesus did few miracles in his hometown “because of their unbelief.” Unbelief blinds people to the truth and robs them of hope. These people missed the Messiah. How does your faith measure up? If you can’t see God’s work, perhaps it is because of your unbelief. Believe, ask God for a mighty work in your life, and expect him to act. Look with the eyes of faith.

Bible (i use NLT Bible currently) verse from Matthew 13:58 - And so he did only a few miracles there because of their unbelief.

For my visual learning friends (who like to see things in a nice form), i made a picture for you :D

So this got me thinking about my prayer life. Not just mine, but me and Peter. I wonder, if our unbelief might be stopping God from blessing us? Could it be that we pray for providence say financially, but in our hearts we believe that God really gives us only what we need. I really mean, what we need, like just enough. Could it be that this is our voluntary suffering and we never have more than what we need, because we don’t dare dream of it? Especially if we think of the scripture in Matthew 13:31-32 that tells us not to worry.
31"So don’t worry about these things, saying, ‘What will we eat? What will we drink? What will we wear?’ 32These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers, but your heavenly Father already knows all your needs.

He already knows our needs? Well yes He does. But is it just the needs. Just barely enough to cover our needs?
Also if we look at Psalm 37:4 that says - Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you your heart’s desires.
So i have desires in my heart and i can actually get them? Well all this is rather confusing, i know. I am confused sometimes too.

But my question here is, are we praying with unbelief? If we desire to live well, to live healthy, to live better, can we ask for that, or is that greediness? For example, so far i’ve just prayed for God to provide, not really expecting much, because i am simple person who can manage with quite a little. BUT what if God wants us to have more, but we just aren’t asking. That reminds me of another scripture. In Luke 16:10 it says: “If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities.”
So yes, i am okay with having little, but should i ask for more? I have no idea, because sometimes Bible sure is contradicting.

If we are to be faithful in small, then get the bigger thing, yet there’s a verse regarding the desires of our heart and my heart does start to desire more than i have. More because i’ve been faithful in the little so so long. As long as i remember. Just barely managing to feed myself, clothe myself. Not even having enough for dentist or whatever else. So i wonder, should i ask for more, or just be faithful in small and wait until God gives me more? Where is the line between me asking for more, because well i’d like to and where does it start to be greediness?
My questions that you may dwell on today are:

  • If we pray for healing, do we really believe in miracles or are we just expecting God to help us manage (take away pain just enough so we could bare to live, or do we really want things to get entirely completely fully healed?)
  • If we pray for providing in financial areas, should we pray for God to give just enough to get by, or should we pray so we can start saving money for future, to set aside for a house, pension, or whatever
  • If we pray for people to get saved, do we really believe God comes through and makes that happen or are our prayers laced with just enough hope that “Lord i ask that you would work on their hearts, but in your timing?”… is that wrong or should we have more faith that God really does miracles?
  • I could go on, but you get the point…

So if we pray, what do we really long for? Do we pray for miracles, for breakthroughs and for unbelievable things, or do we pray to have just enough, to just survive, to just get by, to just whatever else…

Makes you wonder, doesn’t it? :)

Until next time, be blessed!